coming full circle

To say I had a rocky relationship with the camp I went to as a teenager is fairly accurate. During my summers of my teenage years, I would go to a camp called NETC--Northeast Teen Camp, which was usually the second to last week of August. There, we would turn in any electronic devices we had, spend time learning and deepening our relationship with God, and just enjoy being in the presence of one another. I went for a few years, then decided to take a break because I felt as though it was sports heavy, and there wasn't much to do for those that preferred the arts. However, my senior year, after years of not going, I took a risk, and it was worth it. To say that NETC changed my life is an understatement.

When I arrived at Camp Laurel in Mount Vernon, Maine, in August of 2018, I had no idea that my life would be changed forever. At that point in my life, I hadn't really developed a relationship with God yet. Earlier that year, I started studying the Bible, but in all honesty, I started because I felt as though it was something I was expected to do. After some complications, I stopped because I had too much on my plate. That year, the camp's theme was "Stand", where we had multiple lessons about standing up for God. I vividly remember the lesson done on Saturday, which was the main lesson for that week. If I'm being honest, I only remember one sentence from that lesson, but that one sentence changed me for good. The question was raised--what are you waiting for? In that moment, I knew that God was the answer, and will always be the answer to life. I came home from camp that year, studied the Bible, and became a disciple of Christ on January 27, 2019. Fast forward to 2021.

Last time I went to NETC, I was a camper. However, this year, everything in me wanted to be a counselor. In order to avoid rushing into a decision I might regret in the future, I took time to pray about it, think about it, and reflect on what I truly wanted to do. I knew that being a counselor would be more stressful than being a camper--counselors have more responsibility. I had to ask myself, do I want to spend a week out of my summer to do this? I had been praying for a sign from God for a few months, and I hadn't gotten one. Most people would take that as a no from Him, but I never lost hope. I continuously prayed that no matter the answer, whether yes or no, that the sign would be clear. In the middle of the summer, the lead evangelist of my church's region made an announcement that they needed at least one more female counselor to go to NETC. If that's not a sign, then what is?

On August 15th, I packed up my car full of things that wouldn't even cross your mind when you think of camp. Because I was on the worship team for the week, my car had been full of three suitcases, two guitars, a keyboard, some cymbals, and all of the other things you would normally bring to camp. To say that I was nervous was an understatement. I felt this immense amount of pressure, I was called higher and called to show these kids who Jesus is. I soon realized that all I needed to do to in order to show them who Jesus really is, is be myself. We arrived at camp around noon, unpacked our things, and got to work. God works in hilarious ways, He most definitely has a sense of humor. When I discovered what cabin I was going to be in, I realized it was the same one I had been in my senior year at camp.

There are roughly two counselors in each cabin, sometimes three, and each counselor has about six kids in their group. My girls were incredible. I had only known them for a week, and I already have so much love for them in my heart. I am honored to have been their counselor, to be the one to lead them back to Christ, to be the one to listen to them when they truly needed it. It was a special week. I bonded not only with the girls in my group, but in my cabin as well, along with my co-counselor. The first day, we all played a game of Never Have I Ever, and to say we had a blast is merely an understatement. That cabin full of hilarious, wild, beautiful souls made my first year as a counselor that much easier. I can't sit here and say it wasn't stressful at times, because it was. I had much more responsibility, more meetings, less time for myself. Ultimately, my priorities changed from when I had been a camper. I was less focused on having the time of my life and more focused on how I could show these kids how much God loves them.

Post-camp, I'm feeling grateful. I feel grateful that God gave me that opportunity to serve and that I was given a sign that was a clear yes to what I had been praying about. I feel at peace knowing or feeling as though I've come full circle in a way. Camp changed my life when I was in their shoes, and I wanted them to know that the same thing could happen to them if they let it. Coming full circle is a weird feeling, but a great one, at that. Moral of the story--Jesus is in the business of changing lives. See below for a glimpse into my camp experience. I took few photos, but that doesn't matter--because I experienced all of it.

I took this the day we left Camp Laurel. It's bittersweet.

One of my friends took this as I was walking around taking photos of kids. I had the time of my life.

I took this photo the day that I arrived. I was simply excited to be there.

Much Love,

Carolyn <3